to fight bad guys

this month's been so busy for me. talking about this month...i mean august. i thought it was still august. how i wish it's still august. my gosh! it's not august.
let me start this post from today going back to mid-august...my last post. i guess. do someone really cares? whatever.
oh well. today's suppose to be a busy day for me at work but my fave supervisor, julia. thinking of me being all stressed out for my husband leaving. she asked if i wanna go home at 11am. ofcourse i would love to go home. so there i was driving from work to pick up arend. i dropped him of this morning at 630am. he was so cooperative. he didn't give me a hard time. my mom in law and sissy in law are just the best. thank god they are nearby. i miss my mom. bakit ba sya kinuha agad ni lord? last time pong was deployed. i didn't have any problem. she was here. i miss her so much. she took care of me and arend. that was during her remission. at her best after her chemo. she was bald when pong left and her hair grew back when pong got back. she went home to philippines to relax and visit my brother. she thought she was cancer free. cancer sucks! hirap ng wala ang nanay. dammit, i miss her so much.

oh my gosh. her birthday is coming up...next week. we went to vegas for her reunion last year for her birthday. she was so excited and happy.














there she was...talagang sugalera! hahaha!
ayaw paawat!

last night, pong left again. as i was telling arend that his papa's gonna be gone for few months. he right away answered, 'to fight bad guys'. i asked my family who told him that. i am clueless where he learned that concept. pong was busy packing and running errands for last few days and up to last night he still wasn't prepared. i'm certain he's not excited to leave. nobody is. by the way, we still had time to squeeze in arend's school meeting and orientation last night before he left. golly, he's gonna miss arend's first day of school. he's gonna miss half of this school year. he'll be back for the valentines party which we'll probably miss since we're planning on going home to philippines when he gets back next year. we need to bond again as family.
our summer was pretty good. we did a trip to pennsylvania to the hershey park then to sesame place. after that we went to new york. (more stories later on...)
looking forward to pong's coming home...i miss you pah!

follow your heart

my dearest bro checkin' his flight...
going to land of uncertainty.
leaving behind all the opportunities of living the american dream.
i guess we are not like before no more.
we follow what our heart desires.
never mind the promise.
the long awaited moment of having you close.
it's true i will never understand.
i feel that you are still my baby brother,
but time flew so fast.
i wish you all the happiness. a good and peaceful life.
i love you.

comes in three

we have reached our quota. ok!

my mama in december













uncle edmund in june













lola ibay in july













rest in peace. our hearts are filled with wonderful
memories of joyful times together. we love you...

easter blues

ba-bye papa...

my gawd! Holiday's over already?

soooo many things have happened. i cannot believe it. i am not over christmas, i do not have a gift yet for my little boy. i thought i was getting ahead when i put up my christmas decors right after thanksgiving. i was fooling myself. anyway, my mom wanted to see lots of christmas lights and decors. christmas cards are still here and unsent. i bought them early too so mama can send her cards to philippines. it does'nt really matter now.
my brother's here from philippines, arrived nov.29. after a very long wait and suffering, lots of prayers and tears and disappointments, more from my mom's part. he slept with my mom that night. the next day we took mom to the ER. after all exams and lab test, treated her and was admitted. we never left her side. she passed away the next day, dec 1. happy that she saw her son, her prayers and wish were granted. peaceful she was, thank goodness she did'nt have so much pain.
my bro shocked, never thought it would end for her. and for me, aware and knew what's going to happen does not prepare me of death.
i am still in the state of...what happened? is she really gone? she's just in bed taking a nap, she'll call in a little bit.
i cry when i'm driving realizing that i cannot call her to tell her something. her voicemail that used to pick up her calls does'nt exist anymore. i miss her voice, her kakulitan, our little tsismisan.
her funeral was solemn. step dad was able to make it, good friends and relatives were here.
very busy up until now.
my step dad's family came by from dubai and canada unannounced and uninvited for christmas. they called the same day and said "we are coming...in about an hour" ...crazy but it was okey. i wish we had more time to prepare to accomodate them. we had prior engagements and job to attend to and did'nt have the chance to take some days off.
jenny's (arend's god-mom) wedding before new years eve in maryland was a success. oh yea! open bar all night. next day we drove 5 hours for new year spent in north carolina with my family and then drove back home expecting more guest.
tomorrow, my step dad's flying to new york and meet his family before he goes back home to dubai. my bro and cousin here and started working as well.
i never had a chance to mourn, as i said. i sometimes think that she's just in her room taking a nap. it hurts to realize that she's gone for real. i miss her so much.

miss you mah. love you!